Bangkok. What a city!
Its bittersweet charm
Can hypnotize your mind
And make you want to stay
In the Land of Smiles
Fried Pad Thai
And Happy Ending Massage.
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Bangkok!
Please have your drink and enjoy the show
Let our stars entertain you tonight
Just have a look, each of them smiles from between naked thighs
Each of them has a skill that will make you scream
Monkey Number One will spit out a pink ribbon and draw shapes in the air
Better than an acrobat from Cirque du Soleil!
Monkey Number Two shall amaze you with her dexterous use of razor blades!
“Where did they come from?” you may say
Monkey Number Three can drink a whole bottle of water with her tiny mouth
And turn it into coke inside. Huh!
The next one may look like your grandma
But would your grandma shoot darts with such precision and charm?
Boom! A balloon explodes in the hands of that lucky man
Boom! His life will never be the same
Look at that young one over there
She will blow all the candles on a cake
With a few graceful squats up and down
You should order her for the birthday of your son
Instead of that creepy clown
But don’t be overwhelmed by all those wonders just yet
Because here comes the famous match
Oh my, who would guess that?
The Ping-Pong ball goes straight to its goal! And one more!
Our champion will not miss the bowl
Oh, no! The last one landed in that mister’s pint
Sir, you can take it home as a souvenir for your wife
To end with a bang this glorious night
Let our last performer write a note for the lovely crowd:
“Welcome to Thailand” and a few little hearts on the side
(And one downtrodden heart inside)
Ladies and Gentleman, how talented those monkeys are!
They deserve a big tip, don’t they? Be generous, my friends!
But let me collect the donations, I will keep them safe
Madam, did you enjoy the show?
Oh… It left me in awe. How could I describe it with words?
It was… like watching a massacre from behind the bullet-proof door
With a beer and a bag of popcorn
How much is a woman’s body worth?
A few baht as a tip is enough to strip? Strip down from humanity?
Enough to shit into your sacred nest of motherly love and divine zest?
Enough to become a monkey on a circus show?
It was… like stealing candlesticks from a church
Like riding on a pig to a mosque
Like stepping on Buddha’s face
Like shooting the Pope!
All of it for the pleasure of a Western boy
Yet I was there too, on the enemy’s side
It was I, holding a bottle of Coke while that young girl with empty eyes
Opened it with one slick move of her butt
I, handing her a banknote to degrade her existence even more
I, supporting her enslavers’ kingdom
I, contributing with my tourist curiosity to the burden of her disgrace
I, spitting into Aphrodite’s face
I, burning temples, burning them all
I, throwing my stone for the condemnation
Of the red-light district souls!
I was one of them, one of the Western masters
Instead of being her sister
Instead of saying no to that fucking Ping-Pong Show!
That’s how Bangkok is.
Sweet like the smile of a little girl
Selling flowers on the Red Light Street.
Bitter like the lips of her mother
Chopping herself into pieces
To feed the mouth of capitalism.